3P's

Year-end.

I attempted to write but it felt that no words would come out everytime I open my laptop.

Was it then providential that I got to hear Fr. Raprap's homily a few hours ago at the wake of a brother in the community (father of a dear head servant).

In his homily, he talked about things to do before letting the person go. He mentioned 3Ps to remember:

Pasasalamat

Pagpapatawad

Pangako na Babangon Muli

Pretty self-explanatory, right? But then Fr. Raprap has beautifully unwrapped his message, piercing through every heart there is at the wake.(I believe!)

In a similar manner, the message can be applied to everything around us - events,things, persons that we have to bid our farewells to.

So before I say goodbye to 2011 and hello to 2012, I would like to have my 3Ps:

1. PASASALAMAT (Thanksgiving)

I believe that for this year, my greatest learning is developing the habit of thanking the Lord for (almost!) any circumstance that has happened to me and to others.I have had, of course, my complaints, needless worries, etc, but in the end, it is always the gratitude that reigns my heart.


- for knowing God more personally thru Scriptures, Feast and people encountered
- for my dearest family, for the love, support and guidance
- for the Feast, specifically WFA, an addition to the spiritual nourishment I receive weekly
- for the opportunity to undergo "application" at the Training Ministry, another avenue to serve
- for the opportunity to serve with our dedicated Secretariat Ministry members -both Registration and New Attendees servants
- for my Caring Groups, old and new, you guys are awesome! thank you for the trust! everytime we meet, I bring home loads of blessings, affirmations, reflections and things to ponder on
- for the WFA council, I grew a lot bigger - physically, emotionally and spiritually, thank you! (more food trips please! haha)
- for the Singles Ministry, for showing me how fulfilling and happy it is to be single!
- for a chance to celebrate my birthday in a different way - Elsie Gaches outreach
- for an experience to get to know our brothers in prison
- for making me see nature a lot and interact with different people through my travels! (my very first in Malaysia, Indonesia (Bintan), Cebu and Davao, Leyte, Samar, Quezon)
- for the 3 weddings I've attended - showing me a glimpse of a happy married life
- for gimikeros, hs friends and college friends/roommates, for more than a decade of friendship, and a newly discovered (side) career - hosting baby showers!
- for friends in my old workplace(s), for never failing to keep in touch despite the physical distance and busy work schedules
- for my E-Science family, for my great mentors/bosses and a really great team to work with, for the laughters, stories and lunch/dinner/movie dates (and mogu2!)
- for the clients I've worked with and had the chance to be friends with
- for all the big and small breakthroughs - reminding me that God is in control...

Overall, 2011 was a series of transformations and rediscoveries :)

2. PAGPAPATAWAD (Forgiveness)

As our beloved Evangelism Pillar head has shared, he searched his heart to check if there's any pain/hurt left inflicted by his father. And he said he found nothing at all. For this year, I'd like also to let go of all who(and that) has caused me pain and asked for forgiveness as well for those I have hurt.

- to God, for lacking faith and being a doubting Thomas at times
- to my family, for lesser time spent with you, for the few times I was able to help at home,
- to my LOJ and eScience family, for any discomfort/inconvenience brought by my shortcomings as a member, a leader, a servant
- to my friends, for any misunderstandings, insensitivity...
- to myself, for being my greatest critique and punisher

3. PANGAKO NA BABANGON MULI (Promise to Stand Up Again)

As a human being, I continue the battle to achieve a higher self in all aspects of my life - spiritual, relational/emotional, physical, financial and career-wise. I have failed many times trying to change things in my life, I've had my share of minor and major boo boos, but am resolved to never quit and find ways to be better.

Thus, from all of the results and lessons learned in 2011, and as gratitude to the people instrumental for making me see the things I need to improve on, I'd take actions to be more of

- a better daughter
- a faithful and humble servant
- a decisive and passionate leader
- a better communicator
- a more compassionate listener
- a confident and assertive person
- a person who can easily let go and let God


Again, this year, I received a whole lot of blessings, and I hoped as they have overflowed, I was able to share them with the people around me.

For 2012, I expect the many more blessings and graces from God!

P.S. If there's anything I know now that I won't ever let go - He is the one who has kept me through all these years, Who wiped the bucket of tears I've cried, and Who walked with me again in my journey. :)

Fishes, Shrimps and Scallops!

Yey!

No work.

No Meetings.

No scheduled reunions.

MR and I went to SM to buy the ingredients of our chosen dishes. And since I love fish, I went for cream dory and salmon. The shrimps really weren't on my list, but there were no oysters, hence, I bought them instead.

It's been ages since I last got busy in the kitchen. A year ago, I promised I'd start cooking. I did start but I wasn't consistent. Now is another chance to start - I'll have it set twice a month. Let's see if I'm going to be successful. :)

Cooking really is another form of therapy. I usually don't stand up for too long, but didn't noticed I was on my feet for around 2 hours preparing my dishes.

Here they are: 

Shrimp and Scallop Scampi :)



before

                            after                                                                                                             

Baked Cream Dory                                                

 

before

                                                                               after



Looks good? Tasted even better! Lol. :P

Had a great time preparing and serving my family through cooking. Time has really changed. Before my mom and dad were the ones in-charge for the noche buena. Now, we are old enough to let them sit and wait until we are finished with our dishes.

Feels great to be giving back to parents!

Merry Christmas!

to God be the Glory!

I panicked.

I will have my first ever worship, first ever talk, first ever testimony in front of many sisters in the community.

I worked on my slides, I prayed for courage and wisdom, I requested prayers from loved ones.

And then the time came. I delivered. By the grace of God!

Thank you Lord! With you, truly all things are possible!

taal in its usual greatness

I've been wanting to visit Tagaytay for the longest time just to see the beauty God has created - Taal!
I know that if I get to be here, I'll instantly feel relaxed and be able to throw away all the stress and worries felt for the past few months!

Finally, I'm here!

Bonus part is that my friend and I got to stay at Bo's coffee (found by accident) with a perfect view of Taal. Quiet, relaxing, breathtaking view. :) The picturesque Taal enclosed in the seemingly calm body of water is perfect to make me shift to a lighter mood.

I am again reminded of God's love - majestic, steady, deep and perfect!

Thank you Lord!

just some thoughts

when you experience deep sorrow, you learn to appreciate what it means to be happy
when you encounter problems, you learn to appreciate every little means of solving a problem
when you experience rejection, you learn to appreciate and value every little love you receive
when you dried your eyes with tears, you learn to have a hearty laugh in every opportunity given
when you experience loss, you learn to appreciate what you have
when you learn to let go, you experience something better coming your way
when you learn to surrender, you'll feel God's powerful embrace
when you give service, you experience being serviced by God in greater extent
when you increase faith, you'll learn not to worry

***************

little by little, I'm getting closer to you
little by little, I'm letting You lead me
little by little, I'm seeing the light You've been trying to show me
little by little, I'm changing to Your ways

pretty simple

I was trying to look for something to cook for dinner last Monday. I got to leave office early. I was calling my mom checking what are the available ingredients for a dish. She said "chicken". I said "No!". I've been eating chicken for the past N days, I think i'm growing feathers already :P

So anyway, i stopped by a meat shop, intending to buy pork. I was thinking of preparing sinigang, my favorite! (However, I was thinking twice coz I already was able to prepare that, was wishing I could cook at least 1 new dish every month). And it seemed the universe conspired to let me choose another dish, because they already run out of meat perfect for sinigang.

So I settled for fish and misua! It was fairly easy to cook misua, but I wasn't satisfied at all with the taste. After I finished cooking, it then dawned on me that I should have put patola in it. Oh well, at least I know now. Haha. :)

Overall, it was good to cook again. :D

No Pain, No Gain

Definitely true.

This is the message i got from the Feast this Sunday and it perfectly matches my experience last Friday and Saturday. I am in deep pain (deep talaga no?!) - muscles sore from head to toes. But I think I really gained something here - a little more confidence and a new love.

I'm not a super adventurous person, however, I always wanted to try new things. Problem is I always get scared of almost everything - heights, speed, etc. I missed out riding one of the highest roller coaster - Fujiyama, the 107m high Blue Fall in Yokohama, Vanish roller coaster that dives to an underwater tunnel. These were opportunities I failed to grab just because I let my inner ghosts get to me. And did you know that I haven't been to Enchanted Kingdom as well? I was thinking that it won't be worth going there since I have only a few ride options to choose from.

Then last Saturday, I almost lost another opportunity to discover something that I can do and enjoy! Our company outing was held at Lago de Oro - famous for wakeboarding. My officemates and I were lining up getting our ballers and helmets for the activity. But prior to that, we need to sign first an agreement which states something like "the guest signing the paper knows that the activities available at the resort may be fatal...blah blah blah" That made me gasp. Aww. I'm not yet ready to kill myself, do I really want to do this?

But thanks to the encouragement of friends, for the very first time, I set my feet in a wakeboard, held on to the rope, heart beating fast. And then after about 5 seconds or less, I had my first try. Haha! Lining up took more than 20 minutes! Frustrating. So I had my second try, this time, I exceeded 5 seconds. (guess how many more seconds! :P ) After my second attempt, I transferred to the bigger ski park, this time, tried kneeboard instead.

I love kneeboard! This time, I got to experience the wind blowing through my face, enjoying the speed of the cable pulling me. The challenge was to complete a cycle. I had three attempts, unfortunately, I only reached the half of the route. If only we had a few more hours, I'd probably spend a few more times trying until I get a complete turn!


I'm happy I got to try wakeboarding. It is not a scary thing at all. (really! :p) Good thing I was able to suppress my nervousness and was influenced by the excitement and the "courage" of my fellow officemates.

I not sure when but I want to go back! I'm putting this in my bucket list. :)

photo op on my second try :D

one more month!

exactly 1 more month to go!

i am getting more and more excited as well as more nervous! this is by far the most meaningful birthday celebration i'm going to have, not to mention, the most special as well. 

in a few more days, i'll see my dream unfold into reality. i planned a similar one before - a feeding program with bags of supplies for kids in a public school in cavite, which eventually turned into giving school supplies instead to neighbors due to  budget constraints.

it never occurred to me to ask for help outside the few members of my family. but then, one day i realized, i'll be counting years to be able to pull through with my "pay-it-forward" dream.

and now, after a month of planning and campaigning, i'm overwhelmed with an outpour of positive responses.

God truly provides and He sure did blessed me with generous friends who are willing to give their treasures, time and talents. I'll be forever grateful for sharing this special occasion with me.

I look forward to a birthday seeing family, friends and kids at Elsie Gaches, all faces filled with heartfelt smiles.

hisashiburi

I skipped cooking for a while and I missed it!
It's either I have been spending time eating out with friends or rushing some things at work.
So tonight, I got out of the office early and I'm rewarding myself for a hard day's work with a simple dish - TINOLA! :)

Gotta eat now! :)

musings

amidst the bustling daily happy life
some things and thoughts are kept cluttered
a part of me is seeking silence
hoping to clear my mind, cleanse my soul

overcame hurdles,
achieved little victories,
gained new insights,
reached goals,
realized wishes,
yet a tiny, erratic ill feeling
distracts me from feeling whole again

i reach out to You
give me Your grace
fill my heart
with Your unconditional love
save me from myself

chef mode

I noticed when I get home early, I kinda find myself wanting to cook... maybe I should force myself to always leave office early...I might be unleashing my :chef" potential...:P

                                toasted(fried talaga dapat) fish (not sure about what kind these are)

                                                 sauteed bittermelon (not bitter anymore!)      
                       

                                                                   chicken afritada                  

Hope this new thing would help me achieve my ideal weight! (gain 15kilos!)

Good morning!

washed and renewed

In just about an hour and a half, I spent x% of my salary!

...on car maintenance!

she had her bath,

she had her break pads changed,

she had her spark plugs changed,

she had herself tuned-up,

she had her oil changed.

Overall, it was a nice way to start the morning (except for the money I had to shell-out..haha)
Afterall, she deserves to have some pampering now and then (well, should be regularly!) because our safety lies in her. She should get all that she need to elongate her lifespan. So eventhough, my wallet hurt so bad today, I'm happy I gave some time to have her checked.

And while waiting, I began to ponder, our life is just like the car and our God is the generous owner who never fails to shower it with all that it needs and much more.

Sometimes we all get so dirty and broken, we lose sight of the wonderful things God has given to us. We tend to focus so much on how our lives have torn into pieces, inflicting insecurities and uncertainties to ourselves. And yet, here comes our God, just when we thought we hit rock bottom, washing us, wiping the dirt that has prevented us to see a clear vision of what is in store for us. He renews us by changing old parts of our lives into something new. He sends us His instruments that helps us change our perspectives in life and understand what is really essential to us.

And with that, we are able to head to the direction which He leads us - to His Kingdom.

...loving it so far

Here are my latest creations: ( should have made a calendar for this)

Anyway, I just love the spontaneity of having the "urge" to cook. ( didn't really thought this could happen this soon..err..this late? ;P)

I've got good reviews from my family as well (they might be just pulling my leg, but hey it works!)

Grilled Salmon in Buttered Lemon

ham + cheese wrapped in chicken, dipped in bread crumbs

SINIGANG!

                                                           my favorite sinigang na baboy!

hope my new found love  (should i say like first?) for cooking would help me achieve my "gain 15kilos" goal for this year!

first time...again

I never really had the passion for food especially for cooking, as you can see in my very petite built.
My tongue didn't have the pleasure of tasting "good food" especially those with mayonnaise. I also practically grew up eating "dry" food - deprived myself of any "sawsawan" you can think of. I can't tell what the ingredients are for a particular dish. With all thes, you know how poor I have been when it comes to cooking.

Aside from frying eggs and cooking rice, I didn't have a real encounter with kitchen stuffs until I started living alone in Japan. Due to high cost of living, I opted to cook my meals instead of frequently buying from konbini, (convenient stores) fastfood chains or restaurants. Due to limited knowledge about what to cook, i got help from fellow officemates and of course, Mr. Google. But even with these help, my dishes are only for my taste! Adobo, sinigang, mixed veggies, menudo, curry, were my most frequent dishes. Compared to others, my creations barely passed their tastebuds.

I remember one time, when our sensei requested to have a taste of our dishes. I prepared sauteed vegetables with ground pork. When she tasted it, she described it as fushigi na aji (mysterious taste!!!). I guess that's just her way of giving constructive criticism. ;P

We also had a Saturday night pigout session with ex-officemates before. We were grouped in pairs, each Saturday, one pair is to prepare food for everybody. And when it was our turn, I remember everything was prepared by my partner, Mai, while I do the mixing, frying, etc.

When I got back from Japan, I did not cook anymore. My simple corned beef didn't pass my family's taste buds, so I left all the cooking to my siblings and my mom. Fast forward to 2010 yearend. I got inspired by how easy the dish prepared by my boss during the birthday celebration of her husband, our President. So out of the blue, I decided, I'll prepare that for Christmas!

And so here are my creations for the holiday season:

baked cream dory


chicken breast wrapped in bacon
     *my mom placed potatoes to improved the taste - was very salty at first!


carbonara sauce
     * followed instruction of my beautiful sister :D


sauteed mixed vegetables

I hope this new found excitement for cooking won't fade. It's about time to get a little bit domesticated. Am already halfway through my life! Might as well try to make this a hobby. :) I believe this is a another reason why the universe conspired to give me a work near my place. I could do more than my usual stuff.

New year. New beginning. :D

no way but up

IMG_0616
Originally uploaded by blue_sam

Alas!

The new year has come.

I'm ready to embrace what's instore for me! Bring it on.

Thank you for the year that was - somewhat of a roller coaster ride but definitely worth it! Dove down deep and faster than I imagined but rose up feeling the warm breeze. :)



2011 might be another roller coaster ride, but who cares? Might as well enjoy the ride!